Serial Murder I

Well here you have it ladies and gentlemen, the topic you've all been waiting for. Because really, when your layman thinks of Psychopaths, you know he's thinking Ted Bundy, Adolf Hitler, The Night Stalker, Barack Obama... the well known members of our ranks. And it's disappointing for the everyman to find that, the majority of us stay much more under the radar than that.

Which begs the question, How is violence and Psychopathy linked? It's an interesting question, and one where the answer is more ambiguous than perhaps we'd wish. As I mentioned in my last post, there is a wide spectrum of psychopathic personalities. The most studied is the low IQ, Criminal Psychopath, and that's where Antisocial Personality Disorder falls on the chart, in the middle is your everyday sociopath who wields varying but balanced combinations of criminal tendencies and superior intellect, which usually makes him perfect for the wonderfully cutthroat world of business and other such endeavors. Finally, on the far end of the spectrum, opposite ASPD, is the Psychopath, highly intelligent, silently narcissistic, clever and self-aware. The high functioning Psychopath is fully capable of equally 'heinous' crimes as the ASPD'er, but they are more known for premeditated, tricky crimes that if found out, generally fill the media with fascinating fodder for weeks, if not decades.

The thing people don't realize however, is that as much as Neurotypicals differ, so do we. To say all Psychopaths are violent murderers would be foolish, but to say none were would of course be even more so. It's almost like a rockstar who people picture being this amazing freak all the time, until they one day meet them and find they're just as boring and mundane as everyone else, though of course some of them truly do live the lifestyle. Hence their very short, very interesting lives.

Motiveless murder is fascinating on its own. Killing someone in rage is understandable even to the emotional. But purely for some unknown pleasure, that's what truly terrifies people. To think that no matter how nice and good and pleasant they are to people, their life can still end in a horrifyingly violent and bloody way. But what is the difference between a psychopath prone to serial murder/sexual assault, and psychopaths who-aren't? My only hypothesis is Sadism, pure and simple.

When you lead a largely unemotional existence, anything that can get your heart pumping is worth its weight in gold. For some of us, the feel of blood and the scent of fear does that. So simple. Empaths can't comprehend that. Everything must have extremely elaborate explanations. Serial killers must have horrible childhoods where they themselves were constantly raped and beaten and THEIR parents raped and beat them because they themselves were raped and beaten by THEIR parents who raped and beat them because....so on. The problem with that little psychological paradox, is obviously at some point, SOMEONE started raping and beating for no other reason than they enjoyed it. I don't know why that's so hard to believe. Perhaps a second part is in order..

"I wish I could stop but I could not. I had no other thrill or happiness. "

-Dennis Nilsen

Quote of the Day; Murder

“Murderers, in general, are people who are consistent, people who are obsessed with one idea and nothing else"- Ugo Betti

Quote(s) of the Day- from the mouth of a Psychopath

"I was literally singing to myself on my way home, after the killing. The tension, the desire to kill a woman had built up in such explosive proportions that when I finally pulled the trigger, all the pressures, all the tensions, all the hatred, had just vanished, dissipated, but only for a short time."

"I wasn't going to rob her, or touch her. I was just going to kill her."

- David Berkowitz

Horror

I have always had a fascination with the depraved. Even when I was a small child, I would watch 'scary' movies and relate most to the 'villain'. While everyone else cheered the 'Hero's' triumph I would boo him from the sidelines. I never understood their motives. Why sacrifice anything for someone else for no good reason? Why risk something for no material gain? Why do people give money to charities?

I've always viewed this from a logical and cynical viewpoint. Although you must keep in mind, one man's logic is another man's chaos. Anyway, I see empathy as nothing more than over-hyped selfishness. As far as I can see Empaths TAKE the emotions of others and use them to get attention for themselves. But, this was my viewpoint before I discovered my Sociopathy (before I had a name for my... tendencies). I may be twisted and fucked up, but one thing I am not is ignorant. Having discovered I have APD has changed my perspective on many things. Yes, I still believe empathy is pointless- but I also understand that my opinion is skewed by lack of understanding.

I'm not exactly sure what the point of this post was supposed to be- or even is. There's 2 minutes to midnight and I realize I am just expressing thoughts I've often pondered many a time. Why is everyone else different from me? It's a question I've always asked myself, even from a very young age. Not from any kind of insecurity but a burning curiosity. I've always got a mild satisfaction from viewing media centered around the taboo. Serial murder, rape, torture, cannibalism the list goes on. I don't get the same things out of it that I believe Empaths do. I find it interesting to view a 'normal' person's view of the 'other side' of morality. As if it is some tangible wall that separates the men from the beasts. That and a good bloody murder scene has always tickled my funny bone.

I also enjoy seeing Sociopath's in television as the protagonists and how the writers, actors and director try to paint the Sociopath in a better light. Characters like that are literally manipulating the masses through the screen. Just look at the show Dexter. Sure, Dexter Morgan is a blood hungry serial killer with a mild case of schizophrenia (if you ask me..) but he ONLY kills 'bad guys'. Other serial killers to be precise. And although the obvious hypocrisy is something any sociopath could naturally easily ignore, the real trouble comes with how they make him act and his explanations for his choices. In the show they act as if he has a conscience but also the urge to kill- that my friends is great for people like me. YES, absolutely go ahead and create a sympathetic view of the modern day psychopath. Make the masses empathetic to our cause.

By this point I can tell I'm not only rambling, but exhausted. But, this is my blog and so I suppose I have the authority and if anything, the sworn duty, to ramble to my heart's content. This weekend I'm going on a little trip. Out to the desert for a 'nice' weekend of soothing, scalding hot 'relaxation'. I don't know if I'll be able to get Internet there and therefore may be missing a few posts I'm 'sorry' to say. Alas, the world will go on without me, if only for a few days.

The world is but a simple puzzle; it takes an unhindered mind to sort the pieces.